2005 RFKC Staff
(Click title to go to our camp website and see some photos, plus learn more about this world wide organization. There may be camps in YOUR state.)
Long time readers may remember this same time last year when I wrote this poem:
August 14, 2005
Prayers for my campers
Butterfly wings
wake me, sliding gently
out of slumber into nervousness.
The heart beat of hope fades
with drums in the jungle
as the substance of dreams
swirl into nothing.
I have prayed for you
little girls...big prayers of fun.
My prayers, like butterflies in the
garden, only spread pollen
and perhaps next year your
young fragrances will still bloom.
Maybe next year promises
of dew and morning sun
shall be enough guidance
onward toward a future
we have tasted in the past.
Sleep beckons me back
with a lover's embrace
where certainly there are
more dreams of you.
and when I wrote this one:
Tuesday, August 23, 2005
RFKC camp
I learned a new trait
whilst I was gone
your soul taught me
to conquer the largest fear
to dance with the moonlight
to sparkle with sun drops
to float bubbly in the light
to set spiders free
to laugh like a loon
to giggle at midnight
to weep with abandonment
to sing until my lungs hurt
to forget about being ill
to believe
Well I am bringing it up again just to let you know that just because Charley and I are now foster parents we have not forgotten RFKC and what that was like...Indeed we are still going this year and probably every year we are able. (One of our children is the right age to go go and is actually attending the camp with us, the campers are 7 to 11 years old.) So from Sunday morning until Friday night we will leave these children who have stolen our hearts and go and give love to other chilren for a week, hoping that one week can make truly make a difference. In fact, we know that it can because we hear about how it has all the time. Being foster parents now we have even encountered some of the children who were at camp last year and know that they treasurer the experience and look forward to it all year. I also know that some of the kids dread going, like my own little one who told ME that camp sucks and the cabins stink.
I asked this child if there is any reality being used to reach this conclusion or if it is just a guess and the kid said:
"Well, I can just tell it isn't gonna be fun, so there."
If I had known we were up against that last year I would have been scared to death...silly woman. This year I am loaded for bear. Those kids are going to have fun if it kills them.
I am kidding mister or misses lurking social worker, it is a figure of speech, er writing. What I mean is now that I have foster children I have a completely different vision that I am seeing.
But camp will be FUN, FUN, FUN.
I mean, geez it is rule number one and seven of the code book.
xxoo
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wisdom from last year:
what do you say?
When an eighty year old soul wearing the disguise of a nine year old child says:"My parents are in prision but it is ok because my new mom and dad don't beat me."
"I never realized until now that I love my new foster family." (Nine year old girl who has lived in five different homes in the last few years.)
"I don't like it when it is dark....no one will come in our cabin tonight will they?"
"Don't worry, I already have Jesus in my heart. He always protects me from bad people."
"You don't understand Christina, I have to know what happens next. I really don't like surprises."
(After getting out of a bouncing ballon castle..) "I just got everything I ever wanted for my birthday."
"It's ok, I am use to it." (After explaining why something could not happen.)
"You are a liar. All adults lie." (Charley's campers all week.)
"Are you really, really sure no one will come in our cabin tonight?"
"We get to eat THREE times today? And a Snack? What do we have to do in return?"
"No, I don't want to play dress up. Well, maybe I will but only if you promise no one will take any pictures." (She never did play dress up by the way, I believe in my heart it was part of her sexual abuse.)
"Some of my foster parents sold drugs too."
"How do I stop thinking about my mom?" (Charley's camper again.)
(Thru sobs because we ran out of time on Thursday) "But I have to paint these here because Xxxxx uses the money she gets for me for my food. She won't buy me paint too. If I don't paint them here they'll never get painted."
"I wish I could live at camp."
"I want to be adopted because that way I wouldn't have the same last name as my dad. I am embarrased that he's in prision. That way I wouldn't be a part of him." (Charley's again.)
"I missed you while I was sleeping." (After leaning over her bunk to kiss the top of my head.)
"I would like it if you would pray for my brother with me please. He is twelve and he ran away last year. I want you to ask God to let him survive and to see if he could find his way home." (This was the only prayer her and I made every night. It was the only thing we prayed about each and every time we prayed together out loud. Her brother's safety and well being occupies her soul, she is nine.)
After a week of loving on these beautiful children one told me that she really believes that she is a Princess of God and the other bawled because I couldn't hold her on my lap.
I hear God calling again....He's telling me about the plans He has for me. Plans for me to Prosper. Jer. 29:11
the children at camp have been a sort of training for your children now. and yes, your own kids shine a different light on everything. nothing is ever the same. that is one of the beauties that parenting gives us.
ReplyDeletethe comments you wrote half way through the post, killed me..it was beyond sad..
everytime you wonder how much you really have done to change things for your kids, read those comments and see what life was like for them..then look at you and your hubby and see what you have given them now..a home. a real family. love. respect. care.
thank you for loving your kids. thank you for loving all kids. you are both wonderful souls.
it is sad that in a world where any idiot can just reproduce, they do. it is wonderful to see the loving God shine through His Servants, like you both.
I will pray for you while you are at camp making a difference. I'm so proud of you and I'm honored to call you my friend...
ReplyDeletexoxo
ps; is there room for a spoiled little 10 year old who thinks he has a rough life... he needs to be tought a life lesson... I hope this "stage" is a quickie...
Signed, frustrated parent
I can't imagine the pain these kids have lived through.
ReplyDeleteThose kids are going to have fun if it kills them.
ReplyDeleteHeh ... a parent's perpetual job. The child is nearly never harmed, but it usually does a number on the Adult.
ah, such memories....
ReplyDelete......."I would like it if you would pray for my brother with me please. He is twelve and he ran away last year. I want you to ask God to let him survive and to see if he could find his way home." .....
Nine years old; so sad.
Hugs,
V
Tears streaming down my face...
ReplyDelete