a look at love
His small still voice
1 John 4:8 The one who does not love does not know God, for God is love.
Main Entry: 1love
Pronunciation: 'l&v
Function: noun
Etymology: Middle English, from Old English lufu; akin to Old High German luba love, Old English lEof dear, Latin lubEre, libEre to please
1 a (1) : strong affection for another arising out of kinship or personal ties
2 : warm attachment, enthusiasm, or devotion
3 a : the object of attachment, devotion, or admiration
4 a : unselfish loyal and benevolent concern for the good of another: as (1) : the fatherly concern of God for humankind (2) : brotherly concern for others b : a person's adoration of God
5 : a god or personification of love
6 : an amorous episode : LOVE AFFAIR
7 : the sexual embrace : COPULATION
8 : a score of zero (as in tennis)
9 capitalized, Christian Science : GOD
- at love : holding one's opponent scoreless in tennis
- in love : inspired by affection
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Main Entry: 1aga·pe
Pronunciation: ä-'gä-(")pA, 'ä-g&-"pA
Function: noun
Etymology: Late Latin, from Greek agapE, literally, love
1 : LOVE FEAST
2 : LOVE 4a
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The defining moment in life is when one realizes, truly realizes, that life is about what we give and not what we receive. It is not about what rewards and treasures I can label as mine. Life is not about the storehouse of goods I squirrel away whilest alive in this world but rather it is about the love I leave behind. It is about the smile in someone's heart who lives knowing that they are completely and utterly loved, as is. Damaged goods. Imperfect and flawed.
I think about this idea of love often. During lofty times in my life when I am praying and worshiping as well as during the mundane times in my life when all that is happening is daily grooming and face washing.
I think about what it means to love another completely. Could I love that person if they betrayed me? Could I love them if they set out to destroy me? I am human and seldom feel capable of this kind of love. Could I stare down a man with a knife at my child's throat and pray that God protect his soul?
I don't know that I could.
Could I show love to someone who purposely hurts those that I love? Or, would I fall prey to the heart of human kind and wish for their destruction?
Do I have the mettle to be a true lover of man?
Can I forgive and forget or am I too bound by my nature?
I have people who have hurt me deeply. Am I ready to let that pain go and learn to love them?
I am not talking about the fools in the express line with too many items - I am talking about that person that promises to love you NO Matter what and hurts you anyway. For example, I have written before about my father being murdered, am I able to forgive his killer? His killer is dead as many years as him and have I let go the anger?
Really?
Have I forgiven the man who molested me after I babysat his darling children while his wife pretended to sleep? Now that I am older I realize that she was part of the cycle and that they were pedafiles but, can I love them? Can I pray for them?
Praying for someone is a very hard thing because it indicates that you want God to love them too. That you want them in eternity with you. Could I lay down my life for them?
Heavy thoughts.
ckays1967 at 10:50:00 AM PST Link to this entry
Just an editor's note:
ReplyDeleteAs I unpack my AOL journal I keep finding stuff I have written and I think....
WOW, I have written some good stuff. HEHEHEHEHE pretty vain eh?
But I do like what this entry which is why I am reposting it.
I have settled in with what I could and could not forgive. And live withiin the double standard or on the fence, and I validate many things with, "It depends". I do not believe I could love many for the hurts that have been suffered by others, upon their hands.
ReplyDeleteI do know that I do not hate. I do not condone actions, yet I do not hate.
Yet when it comes to children, I do feel a welling in the pit of my stomach. THat no child should be harmed. I dont get that. And I would take a gander to say that this feeling would well up in me if I was presented with such a situation.
I am jaded as it is. These are heavy thoughts...
thoughtful post.... I hope you are feeling better.
ReplyDeleteChris, I`m afraid that I can`t reach that level of forgiveness.
ReplyDelete{{{ Hugs }}}
V
Comment from deabvt - 1/28/05 2:10 PM
In the rereading, I`m reminded of when the Pope was shot and nearly assassinated. His first public appearance after recovery was to visit the assassin in prison & wash his feet. For me, kind of amazing.
I can forgive the girl babysitter who molested me, and feel for the sadness in her, yet if someone hurt my son badly, would I plan retribution or pray for his soul?
I think retribution.
Hugs,
V
V~
ReplyDeleteI am wondering if saddness and forgiveness are the same things? Does one preclude the other? Can one entertain both or just saddness or just forgiveness?
These questions are consuming...
Christina, if someone held a knife to your throught, sweetie they would not live to talk about it! Would I forgive them? Absolutely not, but God would. And maybe in my next I would too.
ReplyDeleteAbout the other things in your entry, I think that letting go of pain is a form of forgiveness. But I could be wrong. Am I?
By the way, I love the painting you have over the blog list. Thank you sweetie, it looks great!
I love you heart and soul,
Mom
Forgiveness is a learned process which each individual must deal with from their own spiritual base. We so often set a standard of limitations with which we will not or cannot exceed. As others have indicated I have forgiven many for injuries to me yet withhold certain actions as too large for my forgiveness.
ReplyDeleteYes, this entry is a heavy one causing us to delve into our inner selves and recognize where we are. My mind-set has continued to be one of targeting the ultimate in forgiving even tho in my gut I don't see me arriving there.
Thanks for bringing this article back to light.
Spencer
http://spencersotherplace.blogspot.com/
Love confounds me.
ReplyDeleteThis is something I still struggle with, but contemplate often. You are a very strong woman, that has been through hell and walked right out with your eye's toward heaven.
ReplyDeleteWhat an inspiration! Hope you are feeling better :)
Everyone else seems already to have said it all.Each person must settle these questions individually, what works for one may not work for another. It comes down, perhaps, to what the Creator is trying to teach us. We hope you're feeling better. May your Christmas with Charlie be a loving one, and your holidays be happy.
ReplyDeleteBlessings on you all,
Bon & Mal
I carried a lot of rage within my heart for most of my life. And even when Christ came into my life I felt it impossible to forgive those who had molested me, persecuted me, and betrayed me. I said, once to the Lord, " I can't forgive these people." He said, " Just say the words, and ask me to help you mean what you say." I said them - and He did.
ReplyDeleteAhh Christina,
ReplyDeleteYou are a questioner. I did that too for one year. I spent the whole year of 1987 asking questions. I would ask one of myself, number a card, write down the question, then ask another question. Most often I’d ask at least 5 questions, sometimes up to 50 a day. Each question made me think, but I found, I never ran out of questions. Some questions would be of similar vein, others totally different. I started January 1, 1987 and wrote nothing but questions until December 31, 1987. In the end, there were over 18,000 questions. I will never be quite convinced the answer is ever as important as the next question ;) I used as my guide the Eastern, “I Ching.”
Keep asking questions, you’ll be surprised with all you have to think about!
Our love,
Ayn